Holidays are hard for people who are dealing with loss. Wanted to share a lesson on dealing with grief from our 2 year old.
Luka’s holding a picture with Stormi in it. Stormi is our foster baby that was recently reunited with her momma after spending a year with us. The framed photo was in our Christmas decorations and Casey set it up in a prominent place over the weekend. A couple different times now, Luka has brought it over to me, pointed to Stormi, and with a sweet and sincere voice asked “Daddy do you miss this girl? You miss Stormi? Do you love her?” And I say “Yes I do buddy, very much. Do you miss and love Stormi?” He nods his head yes, and puts the picture back in its place.
Y’all see what he’s doing? He’s grieving. He misses her and wants to make sure she’s not forgotten. I bet lots of folks can relate to Luka in this way. But a lot of folks may not wanna bring it up for fear they’ll bring the mood down at the Holidays. But it needs to be said. It’s a natural and healthy way to deal with loss. Doesn’t mean that you’re sad about everything, just means that you miss and value the person you’ve lost. Like Luka, you don’t want them to be forgotten.
I wrote this, hoping that maybe Luka’s innocent but effective method of grieving might give someone else permission to share what’s on their heart and mind with others. “I miss ______. Do you miss and love him/her?”
One day, we’ll see all of life from God’s perspective, and things will make sense. But right now, from our vantage point, life is a mixed bag of happys and crappys. It’s important that we get outside of our own head and process what’s heavy on our hearts with others. A 2 year old inherently gets that. Hope we can too.